Miss Moving On
by Ghostie's FF.NET
Summary: Natasha StrongHold has been sent off to live with an aunt in Nanagamari Japan after being released from a program from Phoenix Arizona's local mental institution. For the last sixteen years she's been living on the military base she was born in, then living with her grandmother, and now finally with her Aunt, Lori Yukimura. She thought she might have it easy... Full Summary Inside
1. Chapter 1

_**Authors note:**_ Translations were used with google translate, apologies if any of these are wrong.

* * *

 _Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have - life itself._

 _~ Walter Anderson_

* * *

 **Full Summary:** Natasha StrongHold has been sent off to live with an aunt in Nanagamari Japan after being released from a rehabilitation program from Phoenix Arizona's local mental institution.

For the last sixteen years she's been living on the military base she was born in, then living with her grandmother, and now finally with her Aunt, Lori Yukimura.

She thought she might have it easy. Settle down in a nice place, fix her aunts judgmental views, open a mechanics shop, finish school, live on her own- you know usual teenager stuff.

Except, she didn't count on one particular thing.

Missing the memo on what Japan is really like.

Now, opening a mechanics shop, finishing school, and getting her own place are the last things on her mind.

Suddenly, dodging bio-mechanical monsters, keeping away from high strung criminals, and trying to keep up with the disappearances and reappearances of a cheeky ninja, an over worrying cop car, and a sassy biker, are more important than normal people stuff.

* * *

Getting off the plane was one of the hardest things I had ever had to do. It meant that my life in America, my life in Phoenix was going to end, possibly forever if I didn't play my cards right. But I couldn't let that deter me. I had to be strong, I had to roll with the punches life threw at me, and if it knocked me down I had to force myself up and hit back ten times harder.

I had to do it for them. I owed them all that much.

"Natasha!" Hearing that excited shout as I stepped into the waiting area made me want to flinch. All my things- minus the weapons and ammunition I had been gifted over the years were packed away into the military bag I had hoped over my shoulder. My 'fugly' green pants were tucked into my combat boots, the laces done all the way up and the buckles at the back strapped in tight with Velcro, and they hid the knife I had bought at the souvenir shop. It was easy enough to get one, the clerk took my word on the fact I used to be a military brat, and having a weapon made me feel better.

Telling the truth does have perks.

Seeing the family waiting for me, and seeing the two blonde haired children bouncing with robotic figures in their hands made my heart sink. There was a mother; she was a natural blonde with dads green eyes, stay at home mom for the twins probably, and she didn't seem to go out too often considering the fact she was a little over weight.

Her husband was obviously a native to Japan, probably a mechanic too judging by the missed oil smudge on his neck. He had sparkling brown eyes, and a large excited smile that greeted me. Considering how old the twins look, which was about nine or ten now I'm starting to wonder if he knows just how terrible fathers side of the family is.

I focused on the twins. They held their fathers sparkling brown eyes, and messy, un-kept dirty blonde hair. One had slightly chubbier cheeks, and her eyes sparkled brighter than her brothers.

Her brother on the other hand, was just a centimetre taller than his twin, and he had pale freckles peaking on the side of his neck. He held a yellow robot, obviously merch considering how well used it was and the scuffed white plastic under the paint.

His sister had a blue one, but he was shaped and designed to be more officer type then the yellow mech. Which was shaped better for Kung fu then just regular patrolling.

I could remember being that small, and using army men to help make plans for my family to use when they had to go on missions, of course they never actually used those plans.

Gods how I missed them...

"Aunt Lori, sorry for taking so long." I said walking over. The bag was hiked up higher on my back, and I ignored the bouncing twins as she beamed at me.

" _ **Shinpai nai.(1)**_ We're just glad you're here." She told me. I could see the daring look in her eyes, and instantly knew WHY father insisted on me never meeting them, and stating that I wasn't to go to them if they died. Sucks that mother was older, and she wanted me to go to them to try and fix their stupid ways.

I raised my eyebrow at her switch to Japanese, and felt a pang of pain jerk at my heart strings.

Fine, if she wanted to be that way.

" _ **Anata no sukina yō ni. Watashi wa nihongo to eigo to no ma de Nihon no subete no jikan matawa suitchi o hanashita baai wa, konomudeshou ka?(2)**_ " I asked, smirking when her eyes widened startled. Obviously, she hadn't been told that Japanese was something constantly spoken on base.

Oh gee, I wonder why she would be kept out of that loop.

"M-mixing would be fine." She stuttered stunned. The twins squeaked excitedly at my feet, and I finally look down at them half annoyed. At the shove of the girl like green robot in my face, I blinked startled, and pulled back to look over the merch.

She was obviously a biker type person, cocky too considering the smirk that played on her face plates. Her frame was pure green aside from her feet, which were white from the knee down. All at once, the sister shoved the bike itself at me, and I actually cringed away from it this time.

"These are for you _**Onesan(3)**_!" He chirped beaming. I gingerly took the girl and her bike, and looked both over. With a minute or two of fiddling, I managed to transform the bike, put her into it then clip it into place. Now that she was no longer flat chested, she looked a lot more feminine. Minus curves.

" _ **Okage de kodomo (4)**_. She got a name?" I asked, lifting her up by her arm. Something was off now that I actually looked at her in the armor. She seemed almost-

"Gunmax isn't a girl! Gunmax identifies as a guy!"

Masculine. Of course.

I looked to Lori's husband, and raised my eye brow again at him, while holding 'Gunmax' up a little higher in question. His grin grew larger, and he gave a nod to confirm that Gunmax was, in fact, masculine.

" _ **Kami wa ima watashi o koroshimasu. (5)**_ Right, he. Gunmax huh? Gods help me if I meet his royal sassyness." I scoffed. Her husband actually choked on his laughter this time, and the twins laughed happily together.

"Alright you two that's enough. Katsuo, Aiko, Natasha is probably tired. Lets get your father to work then we'll take her home to rest." Lori said, putting a hand on their shoulders. I raised my eye brow again, but tucked 'Gunmax' into my bag. I wasn't even going to ask about where the three were from home wise. It wasn't any of my business to be honest, at least not until they made it my business.

" _ **Hai (6)**_ mama." They chorused. She smiled, and happily headed for the door.

" _ **Dono yō ni anata wa kanojo no yōna hitobito ni taisho suru nodesu ka? (7)**_ " I asked him as he turned as well. He offered me a reassuring smile, and put his hand gently on my shoulder. I cringed, but let him keep it there either way.

" _ **Rotto to nintai ga takusan. Watashi wa anata ni watashi wa tsuitachi no tame ni watashi o ofu ni dekiru yō ni watashi no jōshi o settoku dekiru to katei suru to, ashita no mawari ni tsuā o ataerudeshou, sā. (8)**_ " He told me, grinning again. I grinned back, and nodded back. He wasn't totally like Lori was. Good, that made my life easier.

" _ **Arigatōgozaimasu. Anata no namae wa nanidesu ka? (9)**_ " I asked. He grinned, and offered me his hand as we stepped outside.

"Shota Yukimura. Engineer, and I hear you're into being a mechanic." I liked him already.

* * *

 _ **Authors Note: Translations**_

 _(1) No worries.  
_

 _(2) As you wish. Would you prefer if I spoke Japanese all the time or switch between Japanese and English?  
_

 _(3) Big Sister.  
_

 _(4) Thanks kid.  
_

 _(5) Gods slay me now.  
_

 _(6) yes.  
_

 _(7) How do you deal with people like her?  
_

 _(8) Lots and lots of patience. Come on, I'll give you a tour around tomorrow assuming I can convince my boss to let me off for the day.  
_

 _(9) Thanks. What's your name?_


	2. Chapter 2

_We are who we believe we are._

 _~ C.S. Lewis_

* * *

 **Authors Note: Translations**

 **(1) Big Sister  
(2) Leave me alone.  
(3) Get me something for my migraine and I will rise from my grave.  
(4) Deckard **  
**(5) Coming Sister!**  
 **(6)Ah thank you very much little officers.**

* * *

 _ **"One-San (1)**_!"

" _ **One-San**_ it's time to get up! You have school today!" I groaned at the dual cries from Katsuo and Aiko from my bedroom door and rolled. My head was pounding with a migraine, and jet lag was finally starting to catch up with me. Which, for someone who never traveled is a pain in the ass to get over.

" _Watashi o hottoi te._ I have a migraine and the fact you two are yelling doesn't help." I groaned. I grunted at the dual bodies now bouncing on my back, and grunted every time one of them landed.

"Natasha! Time to get up!"

"Come on _One-san!_ Up up up!" I groaned frustrated, but rolled over onto my abused back. They fell with shrieks, and sputtered laughter as I peaked at them tiredly. Aiko was at my face grinning, and she a merch shirt on. It held the strange police badge with wings and 'BP' engraved into the metal.

" _Watashi ni watashi no kata zutsū no tame ni nanika o shutoku shi, watashi wa jibun no haka kara jōshō shimasu (3)._ Deal?" I asked, she beamed happily, and nodded excitedly.

"Okay! Here! You can hold onto _Dekkado (4)_ until I get back! Come on Katsuo! She needs medical supplies, we're gonna need Duke!"

" _Kamingu imōto! (5)_ " With them scampering out, I patted around for the blue mecha Aiko had called 'Deckard'. I felt the brush of metal, and pulled his frame in front of me. It was strange; he had the kind of face you could trust, and a smile to contribute to it. Even just his figured seemed almost sad though. Like he was missing someone or someone important to him had died.

Before I knew it, my thumb was rubbing in a soothing motion along his back and along the top of his head.

"Being alone hurts a lot. Not having anyone to talk too even really hurts too. I know that feeling, probably a lot better then you could ever imagine if we met. Something about you is familiar though... Perhaps I saw you on TV hm?" It was strange talking to him without thinking that it was strangely easy to do so. God knows how many times I had done so with the video camera I had packed away into my bag. By the time the twins came scampering in, Deckard was lying on my pillow, and I had my hand over his frame with my eyes closed.

" _ONE-SAN!_ " ugggggh. I sat up slowly, watching Aiko take Deckard from his place on my pillow before taking the cup of water and two white pills from them, and downing the two dry then drinking the water.

" _Ā anata wa hijō ni sukoshi no yakuin ni kansha(6)._ To what do I owe for such heroic deeds?" I asked playfully as the migraine receded. Their eyes lit up, and I felt a swell of regret as Katous clasped his hands together, brown eyes sparkling pleadingly as he dropped to his knees.

"Will you tell us a story about Echo _One-san?_ Pretty please? Mama doesn't like hearing about it, but we wanna know!" He begged. I vented heavily, and threaded my fingers through my hair in debate. The worse that could come out of this was that I got into trouble with Lori, not that I cared, and they decided to join the army. The best that came out of it, they take the lessons that Suspicion and the others taught me and learn from them.

"I don't see why a few before I scramble to get ready would hurt." I relented. They cheered, and Aiko was already raiding my bag for my clothes. I chuckled at her, and watched her brother run for the private bathroom I had been given in their home. I sighed, and went through all the memories I had. Trying to decide which lesson I could give them before walking with them to the school.

Oi vay...

* * *

 _"NATASHA!"_ I shot up straight up from my face into my book and watching videos from the old camera, instincts screaming at me to attack the threat until I noticed the math equation on the board. I offered the teacher a sheepish smile and stood while adjusting my shirt.

 _"Yes miss?"_ I asked politely. She rolled her eyes, and pointed at the equation on the black board.

 _"Answer the equation please."_ She said. I nodded and walked over to the front of the class. Taking the chalk, I looked over the equation and tried not to grimace.

It was pathetically simple, nothing like my math lite classes back in America. Huffing, I tapped my finger against the chalk once and got to work. By the end of the problem, I had drawn it out as simply as possible and looked to the teacher expectantly. She looked it over critically, and then nodded in approval.

 _"Thank you Natasha. Please retake your seat."_ I nodded and happily trotted my cargo panted combat booted ass back to my seat. A few choice words were muttered under the breath of my peers, but I ignored them in favour of catching myself up and working a head in the class.

 _"A Reminder student that you all have to hand in your math projects by the end of the week, and your culminating project IS sixty-five percent of your mark."_ Mrs. Kashiwazaki said, smiling to us as the bell rung. Most of them cheered and bolted quickly, which I followed as well due to being seated at the center of the crowd. Grumbling as I finally pinned myself to the wall, I watched the moving bodies for a minute, and analyzed as much as I could in the short time they all passed me.

 _'Depressed, lacking sleep, math lite, pregnant, going through divorce, feeling trapped, suicidal, coping, existing, ghost, happy, content, gentle, friendly, cheating, cheated on, loving, playful, mechanic.'_ I did this for about twenty minutes until the hall emptied. Heaving a breath of relief, and grateful that the halls were emptier as I made my way to my locked. I spun the dial, only pausing it at the right numbers before it jerked open with a spring loaded kick.

My locker held a few things in it, but not a lot. Mostly a few notes, some chart paper for my plans. I grabbed those, and stuffed them into my satchel as well as the pencil case that Lori had given me before leaving.

It had actually surprised me that she had read that part of my file, and actually gone out to get me supplies to use for when I started designing plans for my vehicle. I was going to use every penny I could earn the moment I heard back from all the jobs I had applied for. Grabbing a piece of Gum, I tossed it into my mouth and chewed happily, taking on the 'I don't give a damn' expression before stifling through my bags for the last three periods I had to die through.

"Natasha!" I paused in shovelling my crap into my locker, and turned to look at Mrs. Kashiwazaki as she ran over to me.

I could feel my heart stop at the video camera she had her in hands, and the fact it- thankfully- wasn't running anymore. My hand gripped at the pocket it should have been in, and I watched her slow to a stop in front of me. Panic started to well up with my fear as I looked up at her eyes slowly. The purple gems glittering in concern as she offered the camera to me.

"You forget this in your class." She said. I nodded slowly, and tired not to snatch the camera from her grasp.

"Forgot, but thank you." I really did try not to snatch, but due to the subtle grimace she gave me it was obviously I failed miserably. I stuffed the camera into its pocket, and zipped it shut before locking the zipper in place. The panic and fear lifted, and I felt regret make itself at home after the two left.

"Sorry, it's just... The camera is really special and personal to me, and I don't often forget about it and leave it just lying around." I explained, moving my eyes away from hers. I relaxed, and looked to the curl of hair just to the right of her eye. It made me feels better, not looking her in the eye.

"I see. It was still running when I found it under your maths book. While your peers might not know English, I teach an English course for the students transferring to the states for a few months." I froze, feeling panic well up in my chest again before shifting my stance. Everything screamed at me to run, or grab my knife and lash out at her. But I couldn't, not when she hadn't attacked me first.

 _'Don't panic, don't lose control, play it off like you have no idea what she's-'_

"I want you to know that you can trust me Natasha. Whenever you need to talk, I'll listen. No matter what you have to say and no matter who is telling you to talk." Shit fuck. I sent her a glare, and I watched the startled fear spark in her eyes briefly. I knew for a fact my glares were never normal, they always held a malicious and insane glint in them. But I preferred them that way, it kept people I didn't want in my life away.

But something about Mrs. Kashiwazaki that screamed being different.

Then she gave that damn smile. The kind of smile you offer to a petrified child that meant 'I care, I know and I want to understand but I'm not going to hurt you when you open up to me'.

 _ **I**_ _ **hated**_ _ **those kinds of smiles.**_

I gritted my teeth, and caught her eyes this time. They stayed kind, even while anger and fear bubbled up in my chest.

"If you tell anyone what you saw I swear to god-"

"I know. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." She soothed, smiling again. I watched her turn and trot away back to her class. I picked up the giggle as she walked away, and tired not to bristle in rage at her laughter. It wasn't fair, she had no idea what I went through until I got here and she never would!

I slammed my locker shut, pulling startled gasps from a group of students nearby me. I turned to them, staring down the group of girls before snarling loudly at them. They squeaked, and bolted down the hall to get away from me.

 _Cowards the lot of them._ I froze, the chilling whisper in my ear making a cold draft claw up my spine as a familiar swirl of black appeared in my vision, facing where the students had run too.

Shit its back- _'no. It's not real, focus on anything but it.'_ I told myself, turning towards the cafeteria. It followed at my side, and hummed thoughtfully as I took my first step forwards.

 _You should talk to her. She actually wants to understand, and that doesn't happen often if I remember correctly._ It hummed to me, swirling in front of my face. Pearly white teeth entered my vision as I stopped, and breathed roughly out through my nose.

"You aren't real, go away." I hissed at it, stepping around it. It floated in my site again, halting me while frowning now.

 _Perhaps not to everyone else, but I am to you. I'll leave for a while if you speak with Azuki._ It offered, holding out its hand. The deal was so tempting, but I didn't want to talk to this 'Azuki' person.

 _Azuki is your teacher's first name._ It supplied, pushing the black swirling mist farther out. I glared at him, but grasped the mist as best I could. I actually felt a grip and something solid beneath my skin and the pulse of life under my fingers. I jerked my hand back startled, and backed away almost instantly.

"Shit fuck, what the hell?" I asked, looking to it. It grinned at me, but simply floated to the side and gestured for my third period class. Stepping around it slowly, I walked towards Mrs. Kashiwazaki's room, and felt dread well up in my chest. I wasn't looking forwards to this talk, but in order to get my companion to go away, I'd be willing for it.

Sooner then I wanted; I was standing at her class room door watching her pack up a bag and hold a cafe ticket. Seemed she was on lunch too, which made it a little easier on me anyway.

 _"You just couldn't have left it alone could you?"_ I asked. She jumped, and spun around to look at me startled. She relaxed instantly, and I tried to ignore the black mist that floated into the room and curled up on a desk. I caught her eyes, and then followed her startled gaze down to my arm. It was shaking hard, practically vibrating from strain as blood stained the white grip I had.

I didn't feel a single shred of pain from it.

 _"Natasha-"_

 _"I do that when it comes back."_ I cut in, turning to look at the desk. It grinned pearly whites at me, and I felt the odd sensation of shaking in my ear, and reached with my free arm to grab as my left. Gripping tightly to try and stop the spastic shake of my limb.

 _"It...? You mean the black mass you mention."_ She said softly. I nodded, and waited for the soft hum of approval. It never came. I looked towards the desk, and watched it fade out grinning. The moment it was gone, pain laced up my arm from my nails and stabbed through my right shoulder. A rough sigh escaped my nose, and the stain slowly eased as the shaking slowed to a twitch once in a while.

 _"Yes. Sorry, it just left and the pain is always intense when it comes back. Anyway, it always comes back when it's mentioned, sometimes it's in a bad mood, other times it's in a good mood and it's pleasant company."_ I told her, releasing my shoulder and stuffing both hands into my pants pockets.

 _"So, It came back when I brought Its existence up?"_ She guessed. I watched her head tilt to a worried angle, but nodded all the same. My clean hand came up, and threaded through my hair in frustration.

 _"Yeah. Though on a good mood thank god."_ I explained. My hand dropped to my shirt, and tugged at the hem of it in irritation. I'd have to clean the scabs in the wash rooms later, and rip my shirt to bandage the wound before it got infected-

 _"I see... I have a first aid kit in my car. If you'll let me, I can clean the cuts and wrap them with gauze."_ Mrs. Kashiwazaki offered, smiling gently to me.

...

Is the world psychic or something? That's the fifth time someone's spoken about what's been on my mind. Are my thoughts special or something?

 _"Uh sure? Thanks Mrs. Kashiwazaki..."_ I said hesitantly. She beamed happily, and finished gathering her things before following me out of her class. I let her take the lead, and watched her uncertain as she led.

It was going to be an interesting lunch, that's for sure.


	3. Chapter 3

_You know, no matter what I am or what I do for a living, I'm still, you know, the husband and the dad and the protector of the house, and I have to be conscientious about that._

 _~Richie Sambora_

 _"You don't have to do this you know."_ I insisted gently, watching Mrs. K finish dabbing the ointment onto my cuts. She rolled her eyes, but switched the ointment for gauze.

 _"Perhaps not, but I want too. Besides, it's the least I can do."_ She insisted back smiling. I gave her a strange look, but watched the gauze wrap around my hand. In seconds it was done, and I pulled it close to rub gently. Ripping the hem of my shirt would have been just as easy to do, but the ointment probably would have been better. Less chance of infection until I'm more settled in here.

Ugh. Moving sucks.

"Thanks." I said, turning just in time to see her shut her trunk, and smiled gently at me. Her purple eyes (I mean seriously? Purple?) Glimmered happily at me as she nodded.

"You're welcome. Now, if I may?" She asked. I knew what she meant, and looked back to my bandaged hand. The other ran through my bangs, and down the back of my pony tail. Bringing the long strands in front of me as I gathered my thoughts.

I knew she wanted me to tell her about It. I didn't have another name for the mass, but it was going to be a very hard story to get through.

Groan.

" _It started a few years ago. Just after I where I was living got attacked – for a little back ground info, I was born and raised on a special opts military base. I lived there 'till I was ten."_ I started, l leaned on her car.

" _The base got attacked by Iraq terrorists. We weren't prepared for it; we didn't have any warning either. One minute, life is good and the next hell fire is raining down and the world is exploding around me. There was a bomb shelter at the center of the base, and it was drill weak so everyone knew that on the slightest sound of a siren we run for the bunker. No one was really close enough to get there aside from me and my older brother Galen. We were a few feet away from it, running towards it actually when a missile dropped and exploded behind us. I was sent flying into the bunker with the roof caving in on me, and Galen was blown to pieces. Most of his body was scattered around and under rubble when they finally got around to where I was."_

" _My dad was the Executive officer, code name Jointwind. I could hear him shouted for everyone to get cover, and get out of the line of site from where I was pinned down. He always was overly loud. There was so much confusion and chaos that in the middle of it, my mom –code name Starshadow, and best sniper on base and head of tactics- noticed Galen and I weren't there and went off in a panic. Dad stuck with her and they tried to find us. I… I found them huddled together over Galen's body and head when I was rescued."_ I stopped, breathing heavily to try and collect my thoughts, and steer away from the memories that were being stirred up.

" _When I was found, apparently I was on top of two survivors who had been trapped in some rubble below me. They... They didn't make it. They died on scene. It kind of showed up after I was cleared from the hospital and I moved in with my Grandmother. It started as just a whisper, someone I could talk too and vent out the nightmares that would keep me up for nights on end and leave me crying when I dwelled on them too long. Then Grammy died. It started telling me to do terrible things, and I was only eleven by then."_

" _My whole family—all the people that had ever loved me were gone and dead. I lost my mind out there in the desert, and it wasn't until I was… fifteen, maybe sixteen that I finally got my head on straight. It stuck around, and I only ever felt anger from It, and It fuelled the anger I already had. It's how I ended up in the institute to begin with. But do to good behavior I got out… You know the rest of it by now…"_ I finished, reaching a hand to rub over my chest. I had gotten so off track in so many different ways it was ridiculous.

But that entire time, Mrs. K never once interrupted me. She just let me speak and listened to everything I spilt to her.

She didn't even comment, just sat there watching me as I spoke.

It was certainly new. I'm used to people talking and asking questions.

" _Good god…"_ she murmured. I snorted a comment ready to burst from my lips as I looked up at her until I saw the tears. I straightened, a jump in my heart as I tried to go through why she was crying.

It didn't make sense, no one EVER cried when they heard my stories, if I wanted them crying I'd be telling all the gruesome details.

"What? Why are you crying?" I asked cautiously. She hiccupped, and rubbed her tears away with a handkerchief.

"Natasha, I had no idea... God how much do you-"

 _"Pardon me?"_ Blinking, I scowled and turned to face the teacher, ready to snap at him for interrupting a private and important conversation until I caught his onyx eyes.

Then everything started screaming at me.

He had onyx eyes, as previously started. But he had obsidian hair to go along with his eyes. He was dressed like every other teacher, suit, tie, and the trench coat for the cool weather. Except he was wearing the coat now.

And even I don't have that much resistance against the heat. I narrowed my eyes, watching him while he shifted uncomfortably under my gaze.

Then I saw his eyes glitch.

Just a faint flicker, like a brief reset before he cleared his throat and smiled kindly to Mrs. K.

 _"O-oh, Kyle. Sorry, we were having a private discussion. Is there something we can help you with?"_ Mrs. K asked, smiling and mopping up her tears best she could.

 _"It's no problem Mrs. K. I was actually hoping to speak with you in private about our second languages class."_ He said, giving me a side glance then looking back to her.

I didn't believe his ass for a fucking second. I took a step forwards when he went to speak, and blocked his site of Mrs. K. My knees shifted to shoulder width apart, and bent just slightly to give me more movement. I shifted my hands up to my shoulder height, both curling into fists as I glared at him, practically daring him to do something while his eyes widened.

I didn't dare take my eyes from his, just encase he decided to use whatever he was hiding under that coat of his. This is why I hate holograms, you can never tell whether or not the coat or the weapon is real and it's practically asking to die if you make a lung for him and the weapon and coat are real. There were a number of reasons he could be here for.

There are a lot of ways this could go.

Horribly and I get expelled.

Really good but I'm arrested for something that I'll probably end up doing like punching a cop.

And lastly, my personal favorite.

I die because of something stupid.

 _He wants Azuki!_

 _"Miss please move, this is a teachers only-"_

 _"Yeah I'm not taking that bullshit."_ I told him, flexing my hands slightly. He made a face, and went to speak while taking a step forwards. My hand lashed out; punching through the hologram and gripping the actual coat he was wear. I ripped, yanking the gun with it as he yelped. Gun in hand, I pulled it apart without looking, watching him stare at me horrified before throwing the pieces under a car.

 _"Bring it bastard."_ I snapped, grabbing Azuki from behind me.

 _"RUN!"_

 _He's right behind you! Run faster!_ I glared at the racing black blur and pushed faster towards the school, Azuki stumbling behind me and protesting the entire time.

"You could help you stupid thing!" I snapped, glancing at it, and then cursing when it vanished.

What a perfect time for it to vanish.

 _"Natasha what's going on?!"_ I glanced back to Azuki, and cursed myself for not letting her in on what my mind was working on. I'm surprised she isn't freaking out too badly though.

I did just punch her colleague and pull apart a weapon in about ten seconds.

"I'm not sure, I've got two possibilities in my head and neither are good things." I told her. I hit the door, and cursed when it wouldn't give under my weight or strength.

"SHIT FUCK! Who the hell thought it was a good idea to lock the damn doors?! Are they computer locked?" I demanded, looking to Azuki. She was paying attention; something else was more interesting than my attempt to get us inside.

Azuki was paler than any ghost I had seen, and the frozen, petrified look in her eyes made my follow her gaze.

I almost dropped dead at her feet at what I saw.

A monster- robot- THING was looming over the far roof of the school. Orange lenses gleamed in an angry way, and the thing was focused straight to me. Its frame was a pale brown and a turquoise like green. Its hide was obviously organic, by the way it moves…

It had to be mechanical too.

"I don't know how you knew I was a hologram, BUT I'LL MAKE YOU PAY FOR BLOWING MY COVER! FUCK MY CLIENT!" My eyes widened, and I shoved Azuki towards the back of the school.

"Go go GO!" I shouted, chasing after her as it crashed into the doors and the school. I kept a hand on her shoulder, continuing to shove and push her faster as the thing swung around, the cameras below the lenses giving off a red light.

"E! Anytime now!" I called, panic and adrenalin giving me a chance to focus more on getting the teacher to safety. A blur of black blocked my site for a second, and I felt the air brush my hair as the things claws nicked it before it gave a loud, painful screech. I spun, watching it rear back and lash out at itself. Oil and some sort of carbonized liquid spraying everywhere.

" _Natasha?!"_ I swung around, and shoved Azuki harder towards the stream of children and teachers running for the streets in a panic.

" _ **They**_ _Have it! Just go!"_ I snapped shoving her forwards.

" _YOU BITCH!"_ I gave a startled cry as it's claws ripped me from the ground. Azuki screamed, and I shook the daze away and fought.

"RUN! DON'T LET HIM GET TO YOU AZUKI!" I screamed, snarling at the machine as he squeezed painfully and lifted me up to eye level with him. I felt the snap in my ribcage, and the small breaking along my arms and hips.

" _I'll kill you first, then I'll deal with her."_ he snarled. Gathering spit in my mouth, I shot the loogie at the optic, and watched smirking as thing rear back with another screech.

" _I was in this shit hole for six months! I kept my cover, kept my head down, taught these bastards, and NOW YOU'VE RUINED EVERYTHING!"_ He roared. I watched the other claw raise and flex, the blades gleaming as he squeezed hardly, bunching me up as the pain blinded my vision.

I couldn't hold it anymore, the pain was too much for me to handle, and I could _**breath-**_

so I did the one thing I could do in this situation.

I screamed.

" _ **NATASHA!"**_ Suddenly I was flying through the air, I could feel the blood that had started gathering in my mouth spit out as I gasped frantically for air while flying. The world was white noise, and I could hear what anyone was saying or what was going on around me aside from the occasional explosion and shout of pain.

Nothing made sense, just made my head hurt worse until I was caught and held. With steady ground under me, I gasped out as the world swam into view. Pain flared up in my chest, sides and my arms. It gave me something to grip onto, and steady the swarm of confusion and everything became clearer.

There was so much shout and so much chaos and explosions and pain and blood and- oh god where was my family where were my parents-!

 _NATASHA! Natasha focus on me!_ The mass of black took over my vision, I could feel tears cascading down my cheeks, and the cupping the thing had on my head.

 _Breath you're having a PTS lasp. You need to breath and clear your head, tell Drillboy to put you down, they won't be able to beat this thing without him. Focus Smallfry, you can do it!_ I nodded, and forced my eyes shut.

' _One inhale, out. Two inhale, out. Three inhale, out.'_ I gulped the air between counting, and focused again on the pain flaring in my ribs. It finally gave me a stable thing to cling too, and I pressed a hand there. More pain, and finally I got a grasp of reality. I built the pain into anger, then lifted my now open eyes to what was around me.

The school was destroyed, ruins against the battling mechs on the ground. One was yellow, built with construction vehicles and a tiger on it's chest. The second was white, black and red. Some sort of rescue vehicle and a cop car I think. A third was hovering and firing at it with a shot gun, and a fourth was firing at it with-

was that SHURIKEN?!

Nope, i'm not even going to ask.

I watched the entire scene grow smaller until the feeling of hovering left, and I now saw some of the build. Drillboy had sat down on the building, and the shaking feeling in my chest and in my core was starting up.

That was always a good thing.

I focused biomecha. Watching him fight and dodge and move against the constant fire of the other four bots.

" _COME ON GUYS! LAND A HIT!"_ Drillboy whined. The mecha's attention was diverted, and I felt that shaky feeling light a fire as he gave an opening to his right.

" _DUCK LEFT RIGHT UPPERCUT!"_ I screamed, cupping my hands around my mouth to make it travel farther.

 _"Do what- GAH!"_ I cursed as he got hit. Some of the face mask coming away with the hit.

"JUST TRUST ME!" I screamed in english this time. I watched the green optics of the rescue vehicle mecha flare brightly, before he dodged left, and threw a right uppercut to it's head. I cheered as the robot went flying back, then flinched down in pain.

" _DRILLBOY COME ON WE NEED YOU!"_ I glanced back at Drillboy, watching his conflicted face as he cupped me up to his soccer ball-

Wait a fucking minute, soccer balls? A quick once over confirmed that he had a soccer ball on his chest.

Nope, not gonna ask about that either.

" _But boss said!"_

" _We can't beat this thing without you! Come on!"_ He made a sound, but placed me gingerly on the roof. My world spun and blurred again, and breathing was suddenly the hardest thing to do in the world.

" _Don't move okay?! I'm gonna be back soon!"_ And then he was gone.

Everything was hurting so badly I wanted to cry. My throat, my chest, my sides all of it. It was like deja vu all over again.

Everything was moving so fast and so suddenly and places were being blurred out and people were screaming and I felt like I was getting stabbed and oh god there was so much blood-

Blood…

Everything came crashing to a stop, and I shakily pulled my hand up to my mouth. I could feel the warm liquid on my lips, and dripping down my chin and throat. I smeared it, then looked to the blood on my hand. My other one went to my stomach, and I followed it down.

A eerily familiar gash was bleeding heavily, and petrifying scratches and bruises marred my skin in all the places that they had first show up on ten years ago. A spark of panic lurched into my chest, and a sound welled up in my throat, and I could feel terror and adrenaline start mixing with my panic and suddenly breathing didn't seem like a thing anymore.

 _Smallfry, relax it's not real. Just take a deep breath and breath._ I nodded shakily, and pressed my hand to my side. Hissing out in pain when it pushed my broken rib to scratch against my lung. The pain kicked the world back into view, and suddenly I was gasping frantically for breath.

 _ **I couldn't breath-!**_

I hacked harshly after a few panicking moments before crashing onto my hands and knees. One of my hacked triggered a gag reflex, and a large splatter of blood burst forwards from my hand onto the pavement. Coughing, I brought my hand to my mouth and whipped away the blood. Smearing it all over again as breathing finally was the new trend.

" _Miss? Are you alright?"_ I gave a long, loud groan before slowly pushing myself back onto my feet. Kneeling there a minute, I continued to gasp air before nodding to the concerned metallic voice. I gingerly lifted a hand to my side, and felt along the break. A messy snap, but otherwise it would be easy to push back into place then rip up my shirt and bind my chest.

Ugggggh. So much for joining the kickboxing team.

" _Miss?"_ I groaned again, and looked to the purple mecha. His optics were glowing emerald in concern, but I could detect the brief flicker of amusement between my actions and my responses. I whipped away the blood onto my shirt, and offered a painful smile to him.

"Guuugh. Yeah, i'm alright for the most part. My ribs are broken and probably all fractured. My lung got scrapped a little bit, so breathing deeply is a no no. But all around aside from setting the one rib I'm okay. So much for school huh?" I asked, stumbling to my feet. The world spun again, and specks of white and black danced in my vision as a gentle hand curled around me.

"Wooo okay that was fun. Lots of black and white, joy. Nope no moving until I can stand on my own." I groaned. He chuckled softly, and I leaned back into his servo as the world stopped spinning, and finally faded back to colors.

" _Sorry about that. Do I need to repeat anything I said for ya? Not everyone knows english after all."_ I offered to him. He shook his head, and hovered his hand around me as I finally pushed to my own feet. His hand there was good, my balance was still bad, but I could move okay for the most part.

"No, _Gunmax is a large help in learning english. Translation will not be needed."_ He confirmed, before giving me a curious look. I blinked, but followed his arm over to the ledge slowly. Surprisingly enough, the metal was warm under my hand, and seemed to pulse with life bellow my finger tips.

That, I WILL ask about on a later date.

"Ooo the shemale's american? Sweet all the fun conversations with him then." I hummed, grinning weakly when he chuckled again. He moved, and I made a sound at my loss of stabilizer. But the sudden loss of ground actually made me yelp startled this time.

"Jesus shit fuck mary ellen." I wheezed, shaking the white stars in my vision.

Once it was cleared, a gentle faceplate was in my view. His head was styled like a medieval knights should be, fin flares on the side and all. I could pick out the sorrow in his green optics, as well as remorse and something else. He said something in japanese, I couldn't understand it at first, but a quick translation in my head pointed out that this was actually a memory.

" _I'm so sorry little one…"_


	4. Chapter 4

_Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, nor hell a fury like a woman scorned._

 _ **William Congreve**_

Almost instantly, the mecha's face changed into the ninja's. The angle I was at meant I was on his shoulder, and he was talking about someone, I could see the mourning gleam in his optics, and he was so much bigger than I was- how the HELL could I know these two!?

"Natasha!" I jolted back from my memory and away from the ninja's face as it faded from sepia to color, and the scenery returned to the destroyed school and surrounding area. Azuki was a disheveled and dirty mess as she rushed over to me. The ninja carefully set me down on the ground, hovering his hands around me to stop me from falling back encase my body decided that gravity was just so in and balance was last season.

Fucking stupid balance center!

 _"I'm fine Mrs. K. Just a few bruises and bumps!"_ She crushed me into a hug, and I gasped out as pain as it screamed white noise in my ears and blanked out my vision with black. I could feel the rib moving and press against my lung, and the bruises and fractures in my arms splitter worse against my frame.

" _Natasha!"_ When my vision came back, and the white noise left, I was being lifted onto a stretcher by medics, the ninja filling them in on what I had told him. I caught site briefly of the knight from my memory, and instantly started struggling against their hold on me.

"Wait a damn fucking minute." I growled towards him, shoving the paramedics off of me.

" _Hey- whoa no get your ass back down!"_ One snapped. I snarled at them, and struggled as the Knight turned towards my direction, I tried to catch his green optics, fighting harder as he seemed to sweep right over me until finally noticing me.

" _Get her a sedative; she's not going down- gah! Son of a bitch she's strong!"_

" _Keep trying, can we get some help here?!"_ I glared at the Knight as he seemed to frown, then turn to the other mech as he came over. A few cops arrived, and pushed me down by my shoulder as I fought harder, landing a few punches to their faces.

" _Get the hell off of me!"_ One had an opening for their gun, and I grabbed it and yanked. They protested loudly, and I could see the Ninja moving towards me to try and disarm me. Some pain flared in my arm- sedative more than likely, but nothing like the institute used to use when I started throwing punches.

I had to be quick; this would be the only chance I get to grab his attention. I aimed best as my tripling vision would allow me, Cops moved frantically as I hit the safety lock, releasing the gun before firing. The grey servo swiped the gun from my hands, but none the less, I heard the bullet make contact, and gave a final scream with his wide optic'd attention to me.

"DON'T TURN AWAY FROM ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU DUKE!" Something collided with my head, and my world spiraled black with Azuki shouting after me and one thought in my head.

 _Who the hell is Duke?_

" _Let me through!"_

" _Azuki-"_

" _Don't 'Azuki' me Yuuta! Let me through!"_

" _She_ _ **shot**_ _at_ _ **Duke**_ _! I don't want you anywhere near her!"_

" _Yuuta_ _ **she**_ _is_ _ **Smallfry**_ _! I know you remember her- you still get nightmares about the attack on Echo four seven two! The young girl you're about to arrest is Nat-"_

" _Natasha_ _ **died**_ _in her Grandmother's care Azuki!"_

" _I'm telling you she didn't! She's in there right now if you'll just-"_

" _She's_ _ **DEAD**_ _Azuki!"_

Hearing an argument like that is never a good thing to wake up too. Specifically when the roof above you is white and everything in you is screaming threat. Sitting up was painful, but it was better than the screaming match. Getting to the window was easier then I thought, opening it? Not so much. But, with some fiddling, I managed to get it open. The city sounds couldn't drown out the screaming and arguing behind me, but at the sound of them getting louder, and Azuki hitting tears trying to climb up seemed like a better idea than staying inside.

Hoisting myself up onto the ledge, I managed to swing my legs over the edge and stand when a huge hand appeared. Blinking at it, I looked up at the knight combiner- Duke's combiner form, and silently stepped onto his servo as the sobbing started.

He turned away, and the sound of jets from his back forced me to sit down. I still wasn't a fan of flying, but something about Duke, and the way his fingers curled around me protectively as he took off and flew away soothed the small fear of heights I used to have.

That I still have.

I watched him a little longer, and the longer I did the more I realized the word was fading to sepia again.

Duke was larger, and I mean even larger than he usually is, and he looked like the mecha from the battle at school. But something was different; everything about him would shift between screaming 'Duke' to screaming someone else. There wasn't sound this time, but the lenses would light every time one of the two talked.

The memory faded back to color as Duke settled somewhere. I could pick up the sounds of crickets and other night creatures as his over sized hand lifted me to his shoulder. Turning obediently, I settled onto his shoulder, and looked out over trees, then up at the glowing stars around us.

We sat there silently, staring up at the sky and not exchanging words. There was… Something calming about the silence, like there was a disbelieving understanding between us.

"You… Have not changed much from when you were a child." I could feel the pull at my lips, and scoffed softly at him. He had a soft, very British accent to his English. It was familiar, soothing actually.

"Perhaps not in appearance, but I have changed Duke." I scoffed softly. We fell silent, and I dragged my knee to my chest, and crossed my arms around it. Both hand gripped my shoulders, and my chin rested on top.

"So… I was dead." I said simply. He hummed, and the whirl of parts signaled he nodded.

"That is what was told to Yuuta anyway. We… Had trouble believing that." He explained softly. I hummed, and shut my eyes against the sudden rise of tears.

"Was your presence on Echo the reason the attack happened?" He was silent, and I could practically feel the shame, guilt and shock rolling off of his body as I waited for an answer.

After what seemed like years, he finally spoke.

"Not that we were told. The remote controlled planes had been specifically targeting military bases long before we arrived. They were meant attack when a motion sensor picked up movement on the ground of the base. We still haven't figured out why they attacked." I froze, my world fading to sepia again, and watching myself beg Galen to take me out on his bike. It looked like an exact replica of Gunmax's, and horror gripped tighter to my chest.

It flowed to him agreeing, and both of us sneaking past the purple ninja and outside. I shut my eyes after that, and forced the memory away as I started shaking. Hot tears streaked down my cheeks, and I choked back the bubbling sobs and guilt weighing down my chest.

"It was my fault," I choked out. I felt him shift, and gripped at my head with both arms. My nails dug into my scalp, and I continued to shaking and cry on Duke's shoulder.

"G-Galen and I - we were out on the grounds on his motorcycle. G-giving it a test run when we should have been staying inside - oh gods it's all my fault I should have just stayed inside. Why the _**hell**_ did I have to beg him and blackmail him into joining - fuck shit crap fuck shit go-d damn!" My barrier broke, and I started sobbing and wailing on the Braves shoulder. It wasn't that soft, innocent sobbing and hiccupping you hear and see on TV or see in girl in the washroom.

No, the sounds I made were loud even to my own ears. They were the cries, screams and wails of a child who was scared, alone, and possibly hurt, and the more I tried to keep it back and within my chest, the louder they got and the more loudly I screamed.

Duke had picked me up at one point, and I was curled into the centre of his chest plates. A familiar thrum came from his frame, and my wailing on grew louder as the lullaby - what I had once thought was my mothers lullaby - thrummed and vibrated out from his body. It was only after I had finally - _**finally**_ gotten the much needed break down out of my systems that Duke brought me up to his covered face plates.

I must have looked pathetic to him. My eyes must have been puffy and red, and I had tears still cascading down my cheeks and I shook and hiccupped through tears.

"Natasha, _little one,_ what happened that day _**was not**_ your fault. You are, but all accounts innocent in what happened to your family. Someone would have gone out eventually, and we still wouldn't have been prepared for the attack. You can't blame yourself for something that was bound to happen." He insisted. Something about the deep thrum of his voice, and the purring of his engine made it hard for me to focus, not to mention it made it hard for me to stay awake.

"But- But if I hadn't-"

"Then someone else would have." I scrubbed hard at my eyes, trying to clear the still running tears as Duke put me back to the center of his chest plates.

"Take your time Natasha; I'll take you back to the hospital when you're calmer…"


	5. Chapter 5

_**White lies always introduce others of a darker complexion.**_

 _ **William S. Paley**_

When Duke took me back, I can safely say that I still wasn't fully prepared to talk to Yuuta. But the fact Yuuta had several other cops there, and he was practically demanding to know where I had gone made my heart ache.

"Don't take what he says to heart Natasha. Just stay calm." Duke soothed. I nodded, but let him lift me up to the window. The two cops seemed to pale as I slipped inside, and backed away fearfully as Yuuta finally stopped shouting. I paused, crouched on the window as Duke looking in from behind me.

"Nani?"

" _Sorry boss. She requested some air, so I took her out for a little while."_ Duke explained for me. I stepped down, and winced as the blaze of pain roared up my side. I pressed a hand to the broken rib, and then looked to Yuuta as he frowned in disapproval.

" _Duke-"_

" _It was either he took me out or I climbed my way to the roof boss. We both know I would have died sooner than listen to you and my teacher argue about who I am."_ I muttered to him. I headed for the bed, and swallowed down the metallic taste in my mouth as Yuuta glared to me.

" _You shouldn't have left, you're under arrest for assault of an officer, you can't just leave whenever you want- this_ _ **isn't**_ _America."_ He hissed. I sneered at him, and clenched both hands tightly.

" _At least in Japan they don't lock people up for being crazy! Oh right, they just shoot and_ _ **murder**_ _people who don't follow their rules!"_ I snapped back. His eyes widened, and I ignored Duke's warning sound as the other two guards scampered out and shut the door behind them. I jabbed my finger into Yuuta's chest, and continued my chastising.

" _At least in America they give you the benefit of the doubt, in Japan the instant you say you're from out of the country they all automatically assume you're a gun loving egotistical psychopath! You know what, I might be a psychopath, but I_ _ **hate**_ _the fact I had to grow up needing to sleep with a fucking razor blade melted to a tooth brush_ _ **just**_ _to make sure the guards didn't strangle or rape me in the middle of the night!"_

" _I hate the fact that once I got out of the damned institution I_ _ **still**_ _had to sleep with a gun in every corner of the house and a machete under my pillow because I never knew when idiot kids from the city would come for a surprise raid. I hate how having just a little pride in what I can do with my hands- what I can create with machinery is automatically assumed to be over confident and egotistical!"_

" _I hate the fact people like_ _ **you!**_ _"_ I gave the older man a shove, watching him go tumbling back with a yelp.

" _Natasha enough!"_

" _And people_ _ **like him!**_ _"_ I swung around to Duke, and glared at him as he jolted slightly startled.

" _Think they know everything about me just from where I come from! I don't_ _ **care**_ _if you were assigned to the same military base as I grew up on when I was ten! I don't care if you all thought that just because I used to be a bright unbroken bubbly thing that I still have that somewhere inside me! Because you know what? I don't have her anymore! She died in that attack! She might have come back- who knows maybe you lot managed to resurrect her while you were still in the country- but she's_ _ **dead**_ _now. I am not, nor will I ever be her ever again!"_ Alright, so I'm not afraid to say I went overboard. I did, but I kept getting that vibe off of Duke that screamed 'I know you and I know who you are and I know that you can be the same person I remember you'.

I don't know about anyone else, but that pisses me off.

 _"Natasha-"_

" _I'm not fucking done yet!"_ I snarled at Duke as he jolted, then swung back to look at Yuuta as he stared at me in horror. I could feel the hot sting of tears in my eyes, and let them skim down my cheeks.

" _I was_ _ **fine**_ _before coming to Japan. Sure, I was constantly in danger of being raped, murdered, or_ _ **tortured**_ _on a daily basis but I knew myself! I had a hold on who I was- who I_ _ **thought**_ _I was and what I thought I knew and now suddenly even_ _ **that's**_ _not true! Suddenly I'm getting memories_ _ **that have never been there before**_ _and they're memories of you!"_ I gestured wildly to Yuuta and Duke, watching Yuuta stand slowly as I swung around to look at the shocked knight.

" _I don't even_ _ **know**_ _who I am anymore! For the whole month of May I have memories of a life_ _ **without**_ _the BP in it,_ _ **plus**_ _I'm getting memories of you all suddenly existing and being called my brothers!_ _ **I have memories of calling you my family!**_ _Of going to you when I had questions and clinging to you after the initial attack!_ _ **How can you fucking know me when I don't even know myself!**_ _I fucking_ _ **grew up**_ _on lies until I came to Japan! My past has been the only thing I've been able to cling to and now_ _ **it's not even the right fucking past!**_ _Do you know what it's like realizing your mind had broken beyond the point of_ _ **recognition**_ _and created memories to_ _ **replace**_ _the old ones?!"_ I forced myself to swallow my next words, and focused instead on calming my breath rather than spilling more than I should have spilt.

The two were quiet, and I kept my head and gaze away from them. I couldn't face them, how could I? I had just spilled and tore apart whatever fragile image they had of me. In truth, I was actually more scared knowing that I had grown up on a lie. But this was a hard punch the world had just thrown at me, and it had knocked me down pretty damn good.

" _Get up Smallfry, you gotta be ten times faster, stronger, and fiercer than the world now."_ I muttered. I practically feared the fact that might not even _**be**_ something my father said, it might just be something someone else I don't remember said.

For all I know I could be living my entire life on a lie, everything that could have happened on Echo, at home, with Grammy- with _**Ed, Fred and Charlie**_ might just be fake too.

For all I know, this entire thing could be fake.

" _You're Natasha alright."_ I jolted, and looked to Yuuta as he rubbed at the middle of his chest. I could read his eyes, but glared at him as he smiled weakly.

" _Even as a kid you had a habit of ripping people's hearts out and burning it."_ He explained. I gritted my teeth, and looked away as tears burned my eyes heavier.

" _I get it from my mother."_ I growled out. He chuckled weakly, but the suddenly invasion of navy blue sleeves circling around me and pulling me into a hug had me freezing. Feeling the warm, close contact of the larger frame crumple more of my walls as my frame started to tremble.

" _Yeah you do. But there's just one problem with the phrase your dad told you. Sometimes you gotta accept help from those around to beat the world back."_ The world started to fade colors again, and I clenched my eyes shut against it and gripped the male frame tightly. I couldn't let myself break, not again.

Not twice in one night.

" _Boss is right… You are Natasha. You're just… An older, broken version of her. But you're still the little girl that we fought to stay behind for. I'm sorry you had to go through all of that Natasha..."_ The tears and sobs hit hard and fast, and before I could stop myself, I was bawling all over again into Yuuta's chest.

It wasn't even Duke who had spoken.

It had been Deckerd.


	6. Chapter 6

_**We live in a world where amnesia is the most wished-for state. When did history become a bad word?**_

 _ **~ John Guare**_

* * *

The next few days were filled with trying to catch up on months of semester work. Catching up had been pathetically easy- again, I was in a Mathlet class back in America. Here it was just Childs play. The only thing I had some trouble with was Japan's history. Luckily, most of the BP- once they had been filled in and updated with what was going on and who I actually was- were around enough for me to ask questions and get the missing pieces of info I needed. Gunmax and I butted heads more often than not, and I had fun teasing the living hell out of Drillboy. He was the cutest thing ever, and I was all too happy to play the 'big sister' role.

But there were times I had to play 'the vault'. I had to be the confidant, the one person that was spoken too in the trust that they'd stay quiet. To be honest, I didn't mind that at all. I felt like I was rekindling my previous relationship with the Brave Police.

I almost preferred the way it was going. I was relearning everything about each mecha. Their strengths, their weaknesses, their hobbies, their dislikes, how they thought, what they were like _as_ _ **people**_ _._ I was recreating the family I had forgotten, with the occasional pop up of a memory.

Those were fun to go along with and tease the BP over.

Through this 'confidant' thing, I found out Shadowmaru had a brother. I also found out how Kagerou died.

Well, okay, technically his AI chip is at the bottom of the sea. I even have the damn coordinates too. Shadowmaru was convinced that he was gone. On finding out that Shadowmaru had seen his brother's 'frame' die, but I begged to differ.

My first project was going to be a machine operated sub with a capsule. It was going to small, small enough to withstand the pressure of the sea, so I could get that damn AI and return the chip to Toudou for repairs. But, after I retrieve the previous data put on it.

Computer code isn't my strong suit, but I did have Charlie. Charlie was one of the guy friends I had back in America, and he's a computer _genius._ If anyone can revive Kagerou, it's Charlie.

A few calls to military buddies who owed me favors later, all my pieces were ready for assembly. That included a tanks worth of power cabling to keep the thing charged. All I needed now was for the parts to be imported than I could start construction.

 _"Natasha,"_ Well, okay and I need Deckerd to stop worrying over me.

 _"You're worrying too much Deckerd."_ I reminded him. I was leaning on the open ledge of my window with my Bluetooth in my ear connecting my call. Drillboy had just bolted off to continue his day off, but he had brought me food so he's allowed to bolt and have fun. Deckerd was on patrol and had called to check up on me.

Again.

 _"When you want to bring in Military grade equipment over the border from America I'm allowed to worry."_ I rolled my eyes, and let the smile play on my lips.

 _"It's for a personal project, not a death ray Deckerd. I'm making a Submarine. I've built a car before- it was pathetically easy. Now I want to try something a little hard, a Sub was the first thing in my head. Come on Deck I have plans, blueprints and all! All I'm missing is a permit, and my parts."_ I chirped. He made a sound of frustration, and I could hear his near defeated sigh just after.

 _"Natasha life isn't nearly that easy. There's paperwork, regulations, restrictions, and it has to be approved before it can be let into the country. It might take a year, maybe longer to get everything you need."_ He warned. I sighed heavily, and pinched the bridge of my nose.

"Yeah yeah I get you _Dekkado_. _But worst comes to worst, my buddies have blue prints of all the parts I need. I can just ask them to email them to me and then I can just make them myself. Find scrap metal should be easy enough."_ I explained to him. He sighed heavily, and I knew that he was either going to use the whole 'stern brother' thing or he was going to start in on another rant.

"Natasha I am serious," Deckerd warned, "What you're asking for so _extremely_ dangerous if it isn't handled properly. If something goes wrong, there isn't a thing I or anyone else can do to help you plead your case." His vocoder had dropped down a few octaves when he started using English. It was a base like sound, and I couldn't help the excited shiver that ran down my spine.

"I know Deckerd. But that's why I have you guys, you're supposed to help me with this so I _don't_ fuck myself over." I teased, _"Besides, I'm serious about this too, you know. I want to do this, even if I have to make the parts."_ This was true. Gunmax had told me of an old junkyard that was used to dump metal parts. Apparently, the Junkyard in question was the same one where Gunmax realized that the BP weren't as bad as he thought. Which, is where the beautiful relationship of bantering he and Deckerd have started. Deckerd sighed heavily, and I swear I could practically feel his frustration over my stubbornness.

"I know Natasha," Deckerd said with a sigh of defeat. _"You're so hard-headed. What have the doctors said since the last update?"_ I grinned hugely when he relented, and fist pumped. It sent a spark of pain up my side, and I instantly crouched down to cover my side with a soft groan of pain.

 _"Natasha?"_ I could hear the near urgent concern from Deckerd, and felt the grin tug at my lips.

 _"I'm good, just remembered that my rib is broken, and that I shouldn't be fist pumping in victory over being stubborn,"_ I paused, grinning at hearing his chuckle before continuing, _"Back to your question. My rib is still broken, and it should be fully healed with in a week or two. I hope. Knowing my luck probably not though."_ He hummed softly, and I could pick up the sound of his radio tuning on, and strained to hear what it was saying.

Just my luck, I didn't hear it at all.

 _"You'll be fine Natasha. I'll come check on you tonight before I go home. Stay out of trouble until then Natasha."_ I feigned being hurt, and made a sound like I was in pain.

 _"Deckerd, your lack of faith in me tares at my heart,"_ I said dramatically. He chuckled in response.

 _"Just be safe."_ He restated.

 _"Yes_ _ **dad."**_ I teased. He chuckled again, and I picked up his sirens just before the call cut. Sighing gently, turned off my earbud, and turned to the side table.

"What am I going do with you coper? You're always worrying, it's going to be the death of you someday I swear." I said softly. Two figurines sat on my side table. Ironically enough, it was Deckerd and Gunmax. My baby cousins had brought them with the last time they visited, lucky me.

The Twins were adorable. They had specifically brought the two, saying something along the lines of me needing body guards, and that Decker and Gunmax were the only ones that were free to do so.

Deep down, the idea of having them as my 'guards' was actually really nice. Besides, I might not remember much from May of 2010, but the Brave Police seemed like a decent place to start anyway.

* * *

Sasukie has been one of the few friends' I've made in the hospital to date. She's in for a kidney transfer, and it's taking longer than it should to get the kidney transferred in. Sasukie's my age, and a plus, she goes to the same high school I do. She's got short, and messy blonde hair, with deep green eyes that contrast her pale skin tone.

 _"Wait wait wait,"_ she's also one of the only people I feel like I can trust with information, like why I'm under house arrest.

 _"You mean to tell me the whole reason you're still in the hospital is because you're under house arrest, and the whole reason you're under house arrest is because you shot at Duke of the Brave Police?"_ Sasukie demanded. Her features were twisted up in a startled confusion, even while she stuffed a piece of cheese pizza in her face. I chuckled at her, and took a sip of my coca-cola before answering her.

 _"More or less. Life let me get off really easy with this stunt."_ I said to her. She gave me a look that screamed 'unimpressed' before finishing off her pizza, and pointing a manicured finger in my face.

 _"Let off really easy my ass. You got off Scott free! My brother robbed a bank about six months ago with an industry robot, he needed the cash for my surgery, and he's getting_ _ **four years**_ _in prison for some dents on one of the Brave Police during his escape, they didn't even charge him with theft, just the assault of an officer."_ She said. I blinked, and leaned forwards frowning. That... Sounded WAY less detailed than is should be. Something wasn't adding up.

... You know what? My gut has gotten me into enough trouble as it is; I'm not gonna even listen it right now.

 _"How the hell are you getting off so easily?"_ She asked, reaching over for the last can of pop. I shrugged, and bit into my pizza before answering.

 _"Obligation I think. They've been a part of my life for a lot longer than a month or two,"_ I explained around the food, I swallowed, and continued when Sasukie gave me a look. _"Do you remember when I said I pretty much grew up on a military base?"_ She nodded, and I smiled a little at the memories I had dug up. _"They stayed on my base for like, a month when I was ten."_

 _"Bullshit!"_ She crowed.

 _"Pure truth."_ I corrected, grinning. She gapped at me, and I leaned forwards even more. _"Do you also remember when I said that I don't remember the month of May? I've uncovered a few memories, and some snippets of that month, and all of them involve the BP in some way, shape, or form."_ I told her. She stared at me blankly, than pointed at me again.

"Bullshit." She said sharply. I smirked, but shook my head.

 _"Pure truth."_ I repeated grinning. Something moved at the window while she reeled, and a glance over pointed out the headlight on Deckerd's back. I smiled a little at it, but turned back and pretended not to notice when he moved again.

 _"So you're getting off Scott free because you think they feel obligated to look after you? Especially when they've known you since you were ten?"_ Sasukie said slowly. Her arms crossed, and a contemplating face twisted up her pretty features. I nodded, and shrugged.

 _"They looked after me when I was a child, then my base blew up, they couldn't do anything to help me, so now they're trying to make up for lost time I guess."_ I explained.

 _"Why were they even there in the first place?"_ She asked, watching me devour the slice. _"It doesn't really make sense as to why they'd go to the states."_

 _"In all honesty,"_ I said, glancing to the window. Deckerd moved out of view again, and I turned to Sasukie with a shrug. _"I don't know. I don't have that memory yet."_ I told her. She huffed, than turned to the door when it creaked open. The nurse poked her head in, and smiled at both of us.

 _"Bed time Sasukie. You have a big day tomorrow."_ She said. Sasukie whined, but helped me clean up the pizza boxes and the cans of pop.

 _"We're not done with this conversation,"_ Sasukie warned at the door way. I saluted her grinning, and watched the door close. Sighing heavily, I turned to the window, and made my way over. Deckerd was leaning against the building, lost in thought about something in the past, or in the future. His shoulder luckily wasn't that far of a jump from my window.

At least five feet. I can jump five and a half. Swinging up, I tossed myself over, and landed roughly on Deckerd's shoulder. He jolted alive, and jerked away from my window.

"Whoa whoa Deckerd wait it's -me!" Did I forget to mention that I didn't have shoes on? Mid jerking, I lost my balance, and went free falling down his frame. Luckily for his awesome reflexes, his hands almost immediately cupped around me protectively, and saved me from a fate worse than death.

 _"Natasha? What were you thinking?"_ Taking a minute to calm my heart beat; I groaned and flopped on his shoulder when he deposited me there.

 _"I was thinking of sitting on your shoulder to talk to you, but that didn't go over well."_ I told him sheepishly. He smiled, and chuckled gently. I beamed, and resettled myself on his shoulder to watch the city with him. We were quiet a while before I finally broke out peaceful silence. _"So. You know now, what are you gonna do with your new info?"_ I asked. He blinked, and looked at me confused.

 _"Why would you think I would do something with the information I gained?"_ He asked slowly. I smirked softly, and shrugged at him.

 _"A lot of people will find out that we,"_ I gestured to him, me, and out to the city and towards the BPHQ where I assume the others currently are. _"Have a connection- that I_ _ **mean something**_ _to you all. A lot of your enemies might use that against you, not to mention a lot of stuff is going to come to light if word gets out."_ I told him. He was silent, but his optics softened, and a smile replaced his serious look.

 _"We'll deals with it. You're our friend- you're part of our family, Natasha. Nothing is going to change that,"_ He said, smiling growing a little. The world faded to sepia, and suddenly we're in the wreck hall of Echo Four Seven Two, and Deckerd isn't the only BP there.

Gunmax, PowerJoe, and Dumpson are on his other sides, and all of them have startled, but pleased expressions as Gunmax leaned forwards, a grin forming as even Deckerd beamed past his blush.

 _"Hey Kid,"_ It was English, but everything about Gunmax screamed that he was about to die with laughter. The same could be said for PowerJoe actually. _"Repeat what you called BoyScout for us one more time, okay Barista?"_ That's right, I wanted to be a Bartender or work in a cafe originally, and Gunmax's nickname for me when he found out was Barista.

Their faces changed to amused, and I remember puffing my cheeks in frustration. PowerJoe called me Cheeto Puff, because of how often I would puff my cheeks and pout at him.

How could I forget all of this?

 _"I asked Deckerd-née-San if you would all stay till September, or if you could all come back to celebrate my birthday if you couldn't stay that long."_ PowerJoe cracked first. Snickers echoing behind Deckerd. Gunmax tried to smother his grin, though he ended up failing and howling with laughter. Dumpson had the biggest, shit eating grin on while Deckerd flustered again, and scooped me up from the floor.

 _"We'll come back Taht, promise."_ Dumpson said. Taht is what Galen called me, most of the BP I think had picked up on it, minus one or two that choose different nicknames. I remembered grinning hugely, then turning to Gunmax and PowerJoe while they leaned together wheezing with laughter.

 _"Ne, PowerJoe-née-san, Gunmax-Née, why are you laughing? This is serious stuff!"_ This time, they froze, and flustered and sputtered. Deckerd and Dumpson laughed this time, and I could remember being so confused about why they were laughing. _"Nani? Dumpson-née! I don't get it. Stop laughing! Come on guys, I'm confused!"_ Drillboy had come in behind them, whining something in Japanese before blinking at the laughing BP.

 _"Nani?"_

 _"Driller-née-san! They're being mean and not explaining to me why they're laughing!"_ I watch Drillboy still, then explode into a huge grin, and snag me from Deckerd as all four broke into laughter.

 _"You called me Née-San!"_ He gushed happily. I blinked, but nodded in confusion.

 _"Of course I did, you're my brothers! My family! Aren't I supposed to put the honorifics on your names?"_ The world faded back to color, and I could feel the straining on my cheeks from grinning. Deckerd was blinking at me patiently, waiting for me to finish the memory that had resurfaced.

They were my family. They were my brothers, my uncles, and the people I loved with _**all**_ my heart. And yet, I wasn't the same person to them anymore. I was a stranger, I was someone they had never met, and I was different.

I was broken...

 _"Sorry Deckerd-née, I got distracted with a memory."_ I almost didn't catch the honorifics I added at the end. But I did, he _**certainly**_ did. His entire face lit up with happiness, and practically glows with the smile he offered me. I could almost read the excited train of thought racing around his head, and not only that, but his smile was fucking contagious.

His smile, I now realize and remember, had always been my favorite part of Deckerd. His smile always made me feel so safe, and I still feel safe looking at it. My heart gave a sharp ache, and my smile slide off when a new train of thought appeared in my head.

I still wasn't the little me they needed me to be, and my heart ached with that thought.

 _"I'm sorry for the fact I'm different from how you remember. I'm sorry I can't be the little bubble of sunshine you all got attached too, and I'm sorry that you have to see me not know who you are. It's not fair to you- to_ _ **any**_ _of you. I just... I'm not her anymore, and you're all waiting around for her to jump out and laugh and being your sister again but-"_ Deckerd's finger touching my lips halted my babble. Tears had budded in my eyes, but were quickly blinked back as I turned, and looked to Deckerd. His finger carefully- so carefully- curled my bangs behind my ears. His smile had softened, and his orange lenses had dimmed to an amber color. The look in those lenses, the understanding and reassurance and the _**love**_ only bloomed the waterfall cooling my cheeks.

He already knew every argument and point I was going to tell him.

 _"Natasha, little sister,"_ His voice had dropped to that reassuring brotherly tone Galen used. The kind of tone a big sibling would use to calm and soothed a crying child, to protect them from every danger and hateful thing in the world.

And he was using it for _**me.**_

 _"We've never expected you to be that little girl we met. We're not waiting for you to turn into her either. We're your friends, your_ _ **family.**_ _Nothing will change that. Yes, you're different. But everyone is, and everyone changes over time. We just want you happy, and if that means we create new bonds, then so be it. We won't force you to remember. But know that we do love you."_ He said carefully. The tears continued to trail down my cheeks, and I hiccuped against the sobs. His finger turned, I think moving to brush away my tears, but he froze when I curled my hands around his thumb, and tugged it to me to give it a hug. He moved obediently, and curled his fingers around me while I buried my face into his warm metal.

"Arigato, Dekkado-Née-San..."


End file.
